TRUST ISSUES
Now I know there are thousands of reasons why this could happen but I'm going to narrow it down to one specific aspect...or two, whichever the case may be. A friend once told me, "the greatest disappointments always come from friends and family" and I added my own two cents, "because they're the ones we trust the most."
But then the moment you use this to act out, all the blame is on you. This leads me to another popular saying, "people only notice your change in attitude but they don't notice what they did to cause it." Deep something.
So now my question is, does this "change" take place spontaneously or do the victims give subtle signs before the "big bang"?
Well, in my humble opinion, yes they do give signs. Lots of them, it's just left to the friend or family in question to notice them. Look not everyone will voice out how they feel and these are some of the reasons why; they don't want conflict in any form, they love you so much that they make excuses on your behalf, they don't have the strength or energy to, they don't even care, they're shy, or they are scared of you. Sound strange? It shouldn't because all these are true. Oh! One last reason; all of the above. Don't be surprised, its very possible for one single person to feel all these at once. I am a perfect example of this. If you offend me today, depending on our relationship, I won't say a word to you. In fact, I'll smile and make you feel so loved you'd begin to think I'm stupid. But fact is, I'm not.
So back to the matter, when this kind of person acts out after years of friendship, you begin to wonder why. You jump to the conclusion that he/she is " becoming proud". You won't understand the fact that they are simply learning to stand for themselves, they're pushing away your oppression because they're just done with you. Before this takes place though, there has to be something that triggers them. It could be a person, or a situation or a present circumstance. Whichever one it is, there will always be something to trigger years of pent up anger that will make them metamorphose into this beautiful swan that you didn't see coming.
WRITTEN BY OBISANYA ADESEWA
Now I know there are thousands of reasons why this could happen but I'm going to narrow it down to one specific aspect...or two, whichever the case may be. A friend once told me, "the greatest disappointments always come from friends and family" and I added my own two cents, "because they're the ones we trust the most."
But then the moment you use this to act out, all the blame is on you. This leads me to another popular saying, "people only notice your change in attitude but they don't notice what they did to cause it." Deep something.
So now my question is, does this "change" take place spontaneously or do the victims give subtle signs before the "big bang"?
Well, in my humble opinion, yes they do give signs. Lots of them, it's just left to the friend or family in question to notice them. Look not everyone will voice out how they feel and these are some of the reasons why; they don't want conflict in any form, they love you so much that they make excuses on your behalf, they don't have the strength or energy to, they don't even care, they're shy, or they are scared of you. Sound strange? It shouldn't because all these are true. Oh! One last reason; all of the above. Don't be surprised, its very possible for one single person to feel all these at once. I am a perfect example of this. If you offend me today, depending on our relationship, I won't say a word to you. In fact, I'll smile and make you feel so loved you'd begin to think I'm stupid. But fact is, I'm not.
So back to the matter, when this kind of person acts out after years of friendship, you begin to wonder why. You jump to the conclusion that he/she is " becoming proud". You won't understand the fact that they are simply learning to stand for themselves, they're pushing away your oppression because they're just done with you. Before this takes place though, there has to be something that triggers them. It could be a person, or a situation or a present circumstance. Whichever one it is, there will always be something to trigger years of pent up anger that will make them metamorphose into this beautiful swan that you didn't see coming.
WRITTEN BY OBISANYA ADESEWA
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